Monday, November 29, 2010

New Year

Thank you for the amazing birthday messages. I'm the luckiest girl in the world. 

This birthday is very important to me. Not just because it is a special day, but it is a very mind blowing one.

When I was little, I never thought I would make it out of 36. I have no idea why or where this possibly started, but I was convinced that at this age I wouldn't get past.

It's now 3 hours past, and I am 37. I made it. 

I thought many times this past year my prophecy would ring true. In the hospital last Christmas, I thought that was it, made my peace and was ready to face the end, if that is what would take me.

Somehow, I fought. I don't know how I do this, but I just do.

This birthday is epic. I made it. 

I thank you all for helping me fight, I surely wouldn't be here otherwise. This is know is true. 

I've been terrified, which doesn't mean giving up or giving in. It means that I am just a person. 

Everything, as little as it is, is a new accomplishment. This year, I do feel as if I was having to relearn how to do anything - eat, breathe, walk the little that I do, fight for what is right and what I won't put up with.

I might be coming back to me. 

I thank you for the love, the support, treating me for who I am, not what I was, and feeling sorry, or leaving me. People I loved have left me, and that is okay. Perhaps I should come with a warning label now.

Love me or leave me. Thank you for loving me. This birthday is more than a birthday.

I made it.


  1. Rhi Rhi! I cannot express just how proud of you I am. You've come such a long way in the short time i've known you. You've learned the importance of taking baby steps & look at what you've accomplished! Celebrating a fabulous day of life; keep on fighting like a girl mama! I'm right alongside you <3

  2. You not only rock...

    You ARE the rock!