New Year

Thank you for the amazing birthday messages. I'm the luckiest girl in the world. 

This birthday is very important to me. Not just because it is a special day, but it is a very mind blowing one.

When I was little, I never thought I would make it out of 36. I have no idea why or where this possibly started, but I was convinced that at this age I wouldn't get past.

It's now 3 hours past, and I am 37. I made it. 

I thought many times this past year my prophecy would ring true. In the hospital last Christmas, I thought that was it, made my peace and was ready to face the end, if that is what would take me.
 
Somehow, I fought. I don't know how I do this, but I just do.

This birthday is epic. I made it. 

I thank you all for helping me fight, I surely wouldn't be here otherwise. This is know is true. 

I've been terrified, which doesn't mean giving up or giving in. It means that I am just a person. 

Everything, as little as it is, is a new accomplishment. This year, I do feel as if I was having to relearn how to do anything - eat, breathe, walk the little that I do, fight for what is right and what I won't put up with.

I might be coming back to me. 

I thank you for the love, the support, treating me for who I am, not what I was, and feeling sorry, or leaving me. People I loved have left me, and that is okay. Perhaps I should come with a warning label now.

Love me or leave me. Thank you for loving me. This birthday is more than a birthday.


I made it.